The modern world places high demands on us. We want our children to succeed, to be the best in school, sports or the arts. Often, however, in the pursuit of success, we unknowingly put them under tremendous pressure, which, instead of motivating, can lead to serious psychological and physical consequences.
Types of pressure on children
Pressure on children can take many forms. The most common are:
- Pressure to study: Expectation of only Fridays, a red stripe on the certificate, participation in extra classes, competitions and Olympiads.
- Pressure associated with sports: Striving for results, constant training, competition, pressure to win at all costs.
- Pressure to develop talents: Forced lessons in music, dance, art, even if the child shows no interest in a particular field.
- Social pressure: Comparing the child to peers, siblings, expecting the child to be “perfect” in the eyes of others.
Psychological effects of pressure
The pressure exerted on children can have a devastating effect on their psyche. Some of the most common psychological effects include:
- Anxiety and stress: the child lives in constant tension, afraid of failure, disappointment of parents, which can lead to anxiety disorders.
- Depression: Loss of joie de vivre, apathy, sadness, concentration problems, withdrawal from social contacts.
- Low self-esteem: The child feels insufficiently good, feels that he will never meet his parents’ expectations.
- Motivation problems: Loss of intrinsic motivation, acting only under pressure, unwillingness to take on challenges.
- Perfectionism: Striving for perfection in everything, which can lead to procrastination and a paralyzing fear of making a mistake.
Physical effects of pressure
Mental pressure can also manifest itself in physical ailments. The most common physical effects include:
- Sleep disorders: Problems falling asleep, sleep nightmares, waking up during the night.
- Eating disorders: Loss of appetite, overeating, vomiting.
- Psychosomatic complaints: headaches, abdominal pain, nausea, dizziness.
- Weakening of immunity: Frequent infections, colds.
The impact of pressure on relationships
Pressure on children can negatively affect their relationships with parents and peers:
- Relationship with parents: the child may feel unloved, rejected, may avoid contact with parents, rebel.
- Relationships with peers: The child may have difficulty establishing and maintaining relationships, and may be withdrawn or aggressive.
Alternatives to pressure: Supporting child development
Instead of exerting pressure, parents should focus on supporting their child’s development and building self-esteem. Here are some alternative parenting methods:
- Unconditional acceptance: love your child as he is, regardless of his achievements.
- Support passions and interests: Help your child discover and develop his talents, but don’t impose your choices on him.
- Set realistic goals: Together with your child, set goals that are achievable for him or her.
- Praise effort, not just results: Appreciate your child’s efforts, even if they are not always successful.
- Teaching coping with failures: Help your child understand that failures are a natural part of life and there is much to learn from them.
- Build strong relationships: Spend time with your child, talk to him, listen to his needs.
Summary
Putting pressure on children can have serious negative consequences for their psychological, physical and social development. Instead of focusing on achievement, parents should create a safe and supportive environment for their child where they can freely develop their talents and build a positive self-image.
